Stop Complaining and Start Training
Why did you join the martial arts? Was it initially for fitness?
Did you want to be able to defend yourself, or did you just think
that it was a fun activity where you could meet other people?
Whatever your initial reasons for stepping into the martial arts
world, I'll be that sitting around and talking negatively about
other martial artists was not one of them. If you have been in a
school for any time, you will probably find that this activity is
very popular. In fact, it often takes up more time than the
actual skill training does.
There was a time when I was as guilty of this meaningless banter
as anyone. I was training at the Inosanto Academy in Marina del
Rey, CA back in 1986. There were some Saturday morning classes
which ended somewhere around noon. After classes were over, the
instructor (not Sifu Inosanto) and a small group of the
"senior" students would walk to the local Del Taco
(another marvelous idea) to have lunch and talk. I should
actually say to sit for over an hour and gossip. The topic was
always the same. "Did you hear what this guy said about so
and so?" "Everyone thinks that instructor is good, but
he actually can't fight a lick. Have you ever noticed how he
doesn't spar?" "I don't know why that guy got promoted.
I think it is political." What a colossal waste of time. We
would sit there pumping each other up by putting everyone else
down. For me, this ritual went on for nearly a year. Luckily, one
day I had a change of heart.
I spend a lot of time reading self-improvement and philosophy
books, and the idea of speaking negatively is often addressed.
You can easily fond one hundred authors on successful living who
have devoted countless pages to the ravages of negative thinking.
Everything starts with your mind. The way you stretch to the way
you fight to the way you live your life each day is a result of
your thinking processes. The way you think should be analyzed
often and steps should be taken to improve your methods of
thought. It is the same as your martial arts skill. Work on it,
check your results, find your weak areas, and spend time
strengthening those aspects that are holding you back. As I was
improving my was of thinking about life and its obstacles, I came
to realize that what all of the authors were saying was true. My
perception of events was the key determining factor in the
quality of my life! If my car was broken into, (and it was often)
I could either rant and rave and spread the misery to others, or
I could just take care of what needed to be replaced and be happy
that they didn't take the whole car. There was a stimulus in
front of me, and I got to choose how to respond to it. This is
where the work "responsibility" comes from; you have
the ability to respond to whatever conflicts should arise.
Understanding this put the responsibility for my happiness and
enjoyment of life squarely on my own shoulders. Others will do
what they will, but I will choose how to respond to those
actions. The same responsibility carries over to pursuing your
goals. You choose whether you want to work toward your goal each
day. If your dream is to own your own martial arts school, but
you don't have enough money, use your head to figure out some
ways of earning extra money. Save for as long as you need to and
you will one day have enough to open that school. You make the
choices that determine whether or not you will reach your goals.
It is not just fate. Every time you take action toward your
goals, fate steps in behind you and gives you a little extra
push. "If it is to be, it is up to me!"
So one fine Saturday morning I went off to the Inosanto Academy
to take the classes, and ended up at that bastion of health and
nutrition, Del Taco. We sat down and before we even got our food,
the negativity began. This time, though, I didn't join in. I was
more of an observer than a participant as the conversation moved
form bashing one person to the next. Here was one instructor
talking trash about another Inosanto Academy instructor. It
became very apparent that the main motivation for these
discussions was fear. Fear that the other guy was better, or fear
that the other instructor might get more recognition. They were
talking about a guy who had trained hard for years and was a good
fighter, but they would find little things about him to pick on.
Amazing. I thought about this all week, and was determined to
change my destiny.
After classes had ended the next week, the crew packed up and
started the short walk to the cholesterol palace. When I said
that I was going to stay and train some more on the heavy bag,
they were all surprised. As a matter of fact, they actually tried
t convince me to skip the extra training and come down to talk
with them! I am so glad that I refused their persuasions and
practiced. What a difference. I spent over an hour practicing
basic moves while they were practicing verbal battery. With that
one distinction my skills started to improve faster than ever. It
motivated me to practice more at home, and my rate of progress
had increased to new levels. I believe that making the choice
that day to stay in a positive environment and train rather than
miring myself in the quicksand of negativity was one of the
turning points in what was to become my career as a martial
artist. I am thankful that I made the right choice in the face of
peer pressure.
I often have people ask me questions that are purely political in
nature. I get asked about this JKD guy or that Jiu-jitsu
instructor, or asked to give my opinion on some teacher of the
Filipino martial arts. I can often hear that what they want is
some dirt on the person. There is often a surprised look on their
face when I say "I think that he is very good." We all
know that there are people in the martial arts who aren't well
meaning or who's skills are not what they claim, but often people
want to deride someone simply because he or she is not part of
"the group." I think it is because people often build
their self-esteem by associating themselves with a group of
people who have a good reputation. The person starts to think
that his group is the best group, and therefore he must be one of
the best. If someone in another group shows promise, the easiest
way to retain the feeling of being the best is to knock the other
group down, even if it is solely through negative talk. This way
the first group retains the feeling of superiority. As silly as
this sounds, it happens every day.
I have a saying within my group, Jeet Kune Do Unlimited.
"While they are complaining, we are training!"
Naturally, I get a lot of negativity thrown my was because I have
worked hard and have had the good fortune to be able to have my
views heard. When it is time for me to sit down and write this
column or an article, my goal is to provide the reader with
something that will help him or her to become a better person and
martial artist. When I state my viewpoint about being a complete
martial artist, or learning from different instructors, or not
being struck to tradition, other will invariably take that as an
attack on their method and lash out against me. It doesn't
matter. I just want what is best for my students and for martial
artists everywhere who want to be the best they can be. It is now
6:25 AM as I finish this piece. In the next hour I am sure that a
lot of complaining will be done in the martial arts field. As for
me, I'll be at the gym practicing realistically in all of the
ranges. I hope you do the same.
© 1997 Burton Richardson
Jeet Kune Do Unlimited Web Site
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